Thursday, July 14, 2005

Food Review 5: Quick Restaurant Grading System

This is the concise guide on how to grade a restaurant on your next visit.

Food:

0-2: I had better dog food.
2-4: Depressing. You thought you can certainly do a better job.
4-6: Pretty average food, that blends in the typical mass production food that promises fulfilling of hunger desires only.
6-8: Food for life, enough to crave for but not enough to die for.
8-10: A 'wow' in every single bite. Truly uniquely and amazing that assures permanent rememberance.

Service:

0-2: You now appreciate how crying children can be entertaining. Third-rated.
2-4: You are better off serving yourself.
4-6: Average impression do not last.
6-8: If only all people are so polite.
8-10: You wish you had more money for the extra tips truly deserved.

Ambience:

0-2: It reminds you of the maggots infested toilets.
2-4: Your enemy's home feels better.
4-6: Come and go, just any everyday place.
6-8: If time allows, you would not mind staying longer.
8-10: Fit for the royalty.

Overall:

0-2: Even if the meal is free, you reckon that you that you might die inside.
2-4: Time to whisper to your friend on where not to have their lunches at.
4-6: You were satisfied enough but probably would not want to have a second visit.
6-8: Above average restaurant, just some 'wows' . Good enough.
8-10: A truly incredible restaurant experience that always comes to your mind. A second visit will be on the next line of your wish list.

The following touches on criteria in selecting restaurants into 2 categories. The 'Condemn List' and the 'Top Favourite List'.

Condemn List:
-Scores below 4 in at least one category.
-An 'Overall' rating of below 3.
-A vow not to visit the place again.
-Tell at least 10 people about your horrible experience.
-Advertising does not change your opinion about it.
-Even if the place is filled with crowds, you are glad that you are not so naive.

Top Favourite List:
-Scores at least an 8 in the 'Food' category.
-Scores at least an 8 in the 'Overall' category.
-At least make 2 visits.
-Do not necessary have to tell to the world.
-Location does not matter.
-Commercial advertising plays no part.

2 Comments:

Anonymous steven said...

another cock write-up.. wahahaha.. still.. keep them coming~

14/7/05 18:39  
Anonymous dev! said...

*claps*

GREAT message... by STEVEN! wahahhaha

24/7/05 03:22  

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